The Problem with "All Lives Matter."

There’s a Problem with “All Lives Matter”

            Luke 15:3-7 (Parable of the Lost Sheep)

            Matthew 5:1-11 (The Beatitudes)

            I’m scrolling through my Facebook feed, and I keep seeing a number of people posting “All Lives Matter” as a response to the Black Lives Matter narrative. Now, let me be clear: this is true. All lives do, indeed, matter. I am not arguing that at all, and you will be hard-pressed to find a passage in the Bible that negates this fact. John 3:16 states, “God so loved THE WORLD that he gave his only Son, so that everyone who believes in him won’t perish but will have eternal life” (CEB, emphasis mine). It’s not “God so loved only this particular people group” – the author of John’s Gospel clearly states that God so loved the world, which, last I checked, has a lot of people groups. We also find Jesus’ missional target for his disciples in Matthew 28’s Great Commission, where we read in verse 19, “Therefore, go and make disciples OF ALL NATIONS, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit,” (Matthew 28:19, CEB, emphasis mine). Again, we are seeing that the targeted recipients of God’s love are meant to be everybody because everybody is loved – we are not called to exclude. Now that we have that cleared up…

            The problem with “All Lives Matter” isn’t the truth held within this statement; instead, it is how it is being used. The problem is that it’s being used as a response to a particular message in an attempt to drown out said particular message. I say “particular” because I haven’t seen an All Lives Matter response to Blue Lives Matter… those who use this phrase appear to be fine with sympathizing with law enforcement by their lack of generalizing which lives matter in those instances; Yet when it comes to the voices of black men and women who have undergone countless atrocities for 400 years in our country, and are today still being treated as being less than by many facets of our society, this cry of All Lives Matter seems to be trying to drown out the immediate concern for safety and well-being of our black brothers and sisters in Christ. (This also presents us with the problem of making it “Black Lives Matter” vs. “Blue Lives Matter” when it shouldn’t be an us vs. them / this or that issue – it is a false dichotomy. You can and should value and respect both, but that’s a whole other topic).

I recently wrapped up a sermon series called “Open Our Eyes” – much of the material and preaching notes coming from UMCdiscipleship.org. In this series, we explored how to make disciples, but it might be surprising to many that the work of making disciples starts with working on yourself. We talked about following Jesus’ example of seeing all the people around us – seeing them for the children of God that they are, including their hurts and hang-ups. We find in Matthew 9:36 that Jesus had compassion on the crowds around him. What precipitated this compassion? Jesus saw the crowds. This isn’t saying that Jesus had a bean counter and saw that a lot of people were around him… Jesus saw the people within the crowd, and because he saw that the people around him were troubled and helpless, he had compassion on them.

We also spoke about the importance of hearing all the people around us. Oftentimes, we only listen to ourselves or to those that simply confirm our biases. Beyond what we explored in that sermon, we find that when we shut our ears off from hearing the cries for help from others, we are doing a number of things. First, we are not respecting the image of God in our fellow man. By dictating our own set of what and who is to be respected and loved, we place ourselves above God’s command to love our neighbor. This leads us to the second point: we are shutting our ears from hearing how God may be calling us to action in the very mission field that we were sent to. This leads us directly to #3: by refusing to hear those cries, we are not validating the experiences of, or seeking relationships with, those in pain. The very act of refusing to hear the voice of others is antithetical to the Good News that Jesus came to deliver. This last point also makes discipling impossible, for if one cannot or will not establish a relationship with someone else, then this discipling that we are called to do as followers of Christ is not possible.

I understand that hearing the stories and experiences of those who are different than you can be scary. Many of the stories that have been shared in conversations, books, social media, the radio, etc… shake our status quo by challenging the notion that everything in our society is fine. But when we hear stories from interracial couples about how the wife drives when they leave town because black men are much more likely to be pulled over for no valid reason, how black men have to consciously act overly nice to everybody in a social setting to try to alleviate the racial stereotype that “black men are dangerous,” and even purposefully avoiding stores and gas stations that have a truck with a confederate flag on it for fear of being caught up in something that they themselves did not start, we are forced to deal with the dichotomy of us believing that everything in our society already works for everyone against the reality that not all men (and women) are treated as equals after all.

I remember being pulled to the side of a Purdue football game when I came to visit friends for a weekend because I “matched the description of a suspect.” Not for one second was I in fear of this officer – I actually thought it was cool because he had pulled me just to the inside of the entrance to the field! Does my experience as a white man nullify the experience of my black brothers and sisters who were terrified as they were pulled off to the side of an event or on the street simply because they “matched the description of a suspect?” Or does my experience that ended with no negative consequences sweep the experience of Elijah McClain’s under the rug, where all he was doing was walking home?

Jesus recognized that all lives matter, yet he also knew when to point out that there is a people group that is hurting and oppressed. In Luke 15: 3-7, Jesus shares a story with a crowd of people about a shepherd that was in charge of 100 sheep and one of them got lost. The shepherd took it upon himself to leave the other 99 sheep in search of the one that was lost. It’s not that the other 99 sheep weren’t important – it’s that they weren’t in danger. They were ok. For this moment in time, the shepherd recognized that this one sheep needed his attention in order to be safe again.

Then we notice The Beatitudes in Matthew 5:1-11. Jesus recognizes where people are hungering and thirsting for righteousness, that there are those who are mourning, those who are being persecuted, those who are downtrodden… but instead of simply stating “Blessed are all the people,” Jesus calls out to them with the assurance that they, too, matter; that they, too, are loved. 

“Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted. Blessed are the meek, for they will inherit the earth. Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they will be filled. Blessed are the merciful, for they will receive mercy. Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God. Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called children of God. Blessed are those who are persecuted for righteousness’ sake, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Blessed are you when people revile you and persecute you and utter all kinds of evil against you falsely on my account.” (Matthew 5:3-11, NRSV)

If Jesus is willing to acknowledge the hurts of people groups who are in pain and reassure them that they, too, are loved – that they, too, matter – what is stopping us from doing the same? Is it because we are afraid that the hate and vitriol will be pointed toward us, then? Is it because we see our friends and family constantly trying to discredit the stories and experiences of the other (whoever that “other” might be) and we were taught to follow suit? Is it because we were told, “Those are bad people who had it coming!” and are having a difficult time removing that lens of implicit bias from our vision of the other?

            I have had to ask myself these types of questions; and if I’m going to be honest, I need to continue asking myself those questions. Seeing others where they are is part of being a disciple. Learning what implicit biases we were raised with and working to dismantle them is part of our spiritual growth process that we are called to do. It is holy work to identify the demons of racism and division in our society and in ourselves. I know I’m not completely there, and that I have learning, listening, and a whole lot of praying to do – but that is the work of a disciple. To recognize that all lives matter, but in this instance, to identify that our brothers and sisters of color are hurting and, in many cases, in real danger.

Using “All Lives Matter” as a response to “Black Lives Matter” is an attempt to mitigate our discomfort at confronting a heart and soul issue within ourselves and our society through defensiveness (adding to the division that is already too prevalent in our world) and reassuring ourselves that we are good people because we claim to support lives of multiple people groups. There have been countless other defensive mechanisms for racism to remain rooted in our national discourse – some of which were very briefly touched in this post – but using this term seems to be the loudest and most vocal… and sadly, even misses the very truth that it holds at face value.

As Christians, we must seek to be more than simply not-racist (for that infers an attitude of “I’ll leave you alone if you leave me alone” and allows one to be quiet while others are suffering because, “Hey, it’s not me!”), we need to seek the footsteps that Jesus has left for us and work towards becoming antiracist. This work, which falls in line with discipleship, calls us to see our brothers and sisters, acknowledge their experience, and seek to transform our communities so that racist actions, words, and policies are no longer a reality for anybody. In this moment in time, not because society is demanding it, but because God has been calling us as the church to do so, we need to respond to the cries of People of Color and respond to them with the appropriate words and actions of affirmation, acknowledging that Black Lives Matter.

And Now: Lent

And Now: Lent

At Anderson First United Methodist Church, there is a wall of glass panels and glass doors that lead into the sanctuary from the narthex area. I remember on a few occasions sitting in a pew in that gathering area, looking into the sanctuary through those design-etched glass panels feeling that even though I could see everything happening and hearing everything through the speakers in the ceiling, somehow still feeling separate. I felt like I didn't need to (maybe even shouldn't have) sung out in the narthex because I wasn't a part of worship by not being physically in the sanctuary.

Granted, I recognize now that that seems silly. I realize now that I allowed that physical glass barrier to be my excuse to not fully engage in worship. But that barrier was still there psychologically. There would be times where I would want to go into the sanctuary, but the doors would be locked. Right there, this glass wall was a physical representation of a barrier between me and where I perceived God to be in those moments.

I guess it's no wonder why then that, in Matthew 17:1-9, Peter wanted to make a shrine for Jesus, Elijah, and Moses and stick around that mountain top. He was in a place where there were no perceived barriers between him and the divine. Here was a literal mountain top experience for his spirit with Jesus literally all aglow and the big-time prophets, Elijah and Moses, were not just standing there but having a conversation with Jesus! Peter was in the midst of the divine without any human limitations or barriers between him and this holy experience - why would you want to leave that?

In "the world," seeing the divine is not always easy. Visions like the one that Peter, James, and John shared on that mountain don't happen but rarely if at all. We have these barriers that both distract and keep us from fully engaging with God. We can blame the usuals for this: the love of money, all the injustice we see happening around the world, selfish people, etc... but sometimes these barriers aren't one of the fill-in-the-blank sins that we love to label - sometimes they're just the struggles of everyday life. It's hard to have a loving moment with God when you are struggling to pay the rent, trying desperately to connect with a child who continues to push you away, or even that frustrating pile of never-ending laundry that refuses to fold itself. Even if it's not someone or something that intentionally gets in the way of your fellowship with the Almighty, we can use everything from family tragedies to the mundane house-hold chores as an excuse or barrier that keeps us from knowing and experiencing the divine in our midst. While we're caught up in life, we can begin to get frustrated and ask ourselves the question, "Why can't all of this just get out of my way so I actually feel God's presence!"

That is one of the things that I really appreciate about church camp. I've come to see church camp - whether it be for elementary, high school, or retreat settings for adults - to be an intentional short-term discipleship community. It's a time where an environment with as little distractions from "the world" as possible is provided with the intent of helping the participants engage with God on a deeper level. (Looking at you, Facebook...) My youth group would refer to Sr. High Camp as a "mountain top experience," and one of the challenges for youth ministry was how to try to keep that momentum that many of the youth felt moving forward once they were back in a world with jobs, peer pressure, sometimes unstable home lives, etc... For this small amount of time, however, they could let down those walls and open themselves up for an encounter with the divine. It was at Sr. High Institute (church camp) that I first felt my calling into ministry. In so many ways, that felt like such a pure moment for me spiritually speaking.

As we work through the liturgical church calendar, moving from Advent and through the church season following epiphany is great as we get to learn and hear more about Jesus Christ and, if we really go for the gold star, pick up a thing or two that we can do to draw closer to Christ. Speaking from a liturgical standpoint, it culminates in the Son of God showing his Divinity directly to us human beings in this passage. But now we are moving into this season of Lent - and how do we move from this spiritually pure moment of engaging Christ so clearly to then confront ourselves and how we allow the world to give us all the excuses to NOT engage with God?

If we are to take Lent seriously, it will require us to be honest with ourselves concerning how and why we choose to run away from God. It requires us to be honest about the type of person that we really are in our present. Only when we have been honest about our actual condition can we then move on towards becoming the person that God made us to be in the first place. That kind of building doesn't happen without first gauging where our starting position actually is.

It wasn't until I read Rev. Derek Weber's preaching notes at umcdiscipleship.org that I had thought about Transfiguration Sunday as being a threshold between the season after Epiphany and Lent. Yet, in this gospel story, we see the transition happen within Peter from this desire to stay in the midst of a spiritual mountain top experience to realizing that it's not about staying up in the light all the time - it's about following (even carrying) that light even into the darkness. God tells Peter, "Listen to him [Jesus]!" with Jesus reassuring Peter, James, and John that they don't need to be afraid.

So yes, Lent can be scary for us if we practice the full honesty that is intended. But we don't need to be afraid. For one thing, God already knows, and somehow still wants to be in relationship with you! For another thing, we already have a guide to follow and listen to.

So this Lenten season, be willing to confront those barriers that stand between you and God. Some may be like a brick wall and obvious, while others might be more difficult to discern until you run into it like that glass wall into the sanctuary of my childhood church. Whatever they may be, may we learn what it is to carry that light we experience in Christ into the world and all its situations.

Pastoral Letter to Otterbein UMC following the public release of "The Protocol"

This is the letter that was sent out in email, posted on the church's Facebook page, and will be made available on paper for the congregation at Otterbein UMC, where I am currently serving at. Seeing as how this news effects more than just my congregation, and how the message pertains to more than just my congregation, I am posting it here.

Brothers and sisters in Christ,

Like I imagine many of you were, last Friday I found myself stunned when I realized that multiple news outlets had dropped a headline concerning the United Methodist Church. Many of the articles and headlines read as though the UMC had just decided to split along with some other misinformation. My purpose in writing this is to inform you of how our denomination’s governing structure works and, hopefully, answer some of your questions as well as some possible implications.

First: Did the UMC agree to split? 

Simply put: No! I can understand how some news outlets got this wrong – our governing structure is different from most governing structures in that we do not have a standing administration that can make changes to our Book of Discipline (our “law and rule book”). The Book of Discipline also includes how the church structure is set up. For a massive thing like a denominational split to occur, is has to go through the decision-making body at a General Conference. General Conference is a meeting where representatives from every Annual Conference worldwide gathers every 4 years. Rarely is there a special called General Conference that meets in between these 4 year periods, and we experienced one of these special called General Conferences in February of 2019. The next regularly scheduled General Conference is happening this coming May 5-15 in Minneapolis, Minnesota.

Second: What actually happened?

There was a group of 16 individuals, well respected individuals within their various “camps,” that met with a professional mediator to put together a proposal for the UMC to move forward. This proposal that was put together by this diverse group was called “The Protocol.” The Protocol is simply that – a proposal.

The Protocol suggests that the UMC proceed as two or more denominations. Simply put: a conservative denomination would form outside of the United Methodist Church, allowed to take their church property with them, along with $25 million. Whoever chooses not to leave with this newly formed conservative denomination would remain in a more progressive (comparatively) or moderate United Methodist Church. The denomination that keeps the name would also retain the various boards and agencies (Such as the United Methodist Committee on Relief, Board of Higher Education, etc…)

This proposal will have to be voted through at General Conference before it can be enacted.

Third: Who was a part of this group?

This group of 16 was comprised of clergy, bishops, and lay people. They were representatives of conservative, moderate, and progressive groups. Was every viewpoint covered? With only 16 people, this would have been an impossibility. There are some people who criticize this fact, as well – but the truth is, if you get too many “cooks in the kitchen” then things would not be able to be accomplished. This group chose to form themselves in this manner. It was not a formally appointed group, but it was certainly a group of leaders from the various “camps” they represented.

Fourth: Are conservatives being kicked out / paid off? Why are they the ones leaving in The Protocol? Why should they get $25 million?

This series of questions certainly reads as personal and possibly offensive to some… if that’s how you read them, that is not the intent. Let me reassure you, however, that nobody is being “kicked out.” This proposal was written with leading conservative voices in agreement.

The Protocol is an attempt at an amicable separation. Ultimately, progressives have proven unwilling to leave the UMC, whereas the conservatives, primarily through the Wesleyan Covenant Association, has already been in process for multiple years of planning their exit if they deemed necessary.

The idea behind splitting in this manner instead of staying and fighting further is to avoid as a denomination the lawsuits that we witnessed in other denominations that have split primarily over the debate of how inclusive should they be of the LGBTQ+ community. I believe that we can all agree that these were messy and did nothing good for the overall witness of the church in bringing forth the Kingdom of God.

Concerning the $25 million, it’s relatively 1/24^th of the budget that General Conference passed in 2016 – so, not nothing, but certainly not everything. Regardless of which side you may feel more in alignment with, it’s really not about the money and more about moving forward in peace so that we might get down to the business of discipleship.

Fifth: What is going to happen at the May 2020 General Conference?

Honestly, who knows. You could do all the polling you want, collect all of the thoughts and opinions you can gather, and you can still find yourself surprised by the outcome. Honestly, General Conference rarely votes something in without making changes to the proposal.

With that thought in mind, The Protocol is not the first proposal that has been written calling for some kind of amicable separation to be presented at General Conference (It might be the one that has garnered the most media attention, however). General Conference will have several options to choose from before it, assuming they even vote to move towards separation. Until May 5-15 comes, we will not know how our church as a denomination has voted to move forward.

Sixth: What now?

The best course of action that I have seen and heard suggested is to pray. Pray for those involved in the decision-making process coming up in May in Minneapolis. Pray for those who are wondering what is going to happen to their local church. Pray for those who are hurting, worrying, and heartbroken over this long and drawn-out fight in our denomination.

None of this is easy – I recognize this. I wish I had all the answers. I am open to talking with you if you have any questions concerning process or The Protocol, but please don’t be surprised when I say, “I don’t know” because, well… none of us have all the answers. In some ways, it may feel like a bull-ride and you begin to wonder when you’ll be bucked off; but let me encourage you to hang on! I can’t promise that any person’s preferred outcome will happen, but I do know that as long as we stick together and remain in faithful fellowship with one another – even in spite some of our differences – we can continue doing what we were tasked with and supersedes this conflict: Making Disciples of Jesus Christ.

My mother once shared with me this thought: that there is beauty in the tension. Tension isn’t comfortable, but when we’re willing to put our differences aside for the sake of the mission of the church – when we are willing to embrace and be in relationship with one another even though we don’t think alike – that’s where the Kingdom is at work and Heaven breaks forth here on Earth. Conflict (tension), dealt with in a healthy way, allows us to grow and sharpen one another. I know that there are people of both persuasions here at OUMC. May we learn to navigate our differences so that we can grow in love together instead of allowing our differences tear us apart and tearing one another down.

Let us put into practice the greatest commandment, to love God and love one another, as we do what Christ commissioned us to do and the mission of the church: To make disciples of Jesus Christ for the transformation of the world.

God Bless—

 

Rev. Benjamin Cassiday

Here are links that can help better inform you of what is happening around this conversation at the denominational level. If the links are not highlighted on your screen, then copy and paste the web address into your web browser.

A link to an article at umnews.org about what is happening as well as various groups’ reactions: https://l.facebook.com/l.php?u=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.umnews.org%2Fen%2Fnews%2Freaction-aplenty-to-separation-plan%3Ffbclid%3DIwAR1uiMsr5DEBwydjMerSj9t-Dyhqxc6groBCeUCBP5eBm8XuFAXZ9fA9xUQ&h=AT2UbckFU5dN22YRgG_1hTe-iuQ00WmDKhQ17fZjaoWfIFEU11sK_Zs5h1TDTI1oR3qL0OuCQdXVLfK92b8DUe8Ct28ShHOH1_EOWTWBJdtY3XLuB3qt1qLBydH7PmH04z3gwGzTvIlQ-OKuSq-SsYEhN5bKn54

A link to the summary of The Protocol: https://l.facebook.com/l.php?u=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.umnews.org%2Fen%2Fnews%2Fdiverse-leaders-group-offers-separation-plan%3Ffbclid%3DIwAR0bwmCluwu_3WmrThJNSRYVakI7Lr7SnqAlhzzKZtuVtXOImZwsDilTt4A&h=AT1KSnkN--VTaWfUnllVQz4giJ0d2BHZAOHJmK25BKO-92k5qade3uJzdQRrHlQLXyToS2xTyzHbgkVAtyLtGaHr840S4zzqqRwFtGyJld4AkWS-vc1_dv5wlXnavKzg_o1OhwYJsY2oDm3UXXTSIXQ2NcU4KSo

A link to The Protocol’s actual document:

https://www.unitedmethodistbishops.org/files/websites/www/pdfs/signed+umc+mediation+protocoal+statement+-2020.pdf

Thank you to Rev. Melissa Englehart for allowing me to use her format and her questions to put this letter together.

Ministry Still Happens

Here is my most recent Sullivan Daily Times newspaper article, "Ministry Still Happens."

Ecclesiastes 3 starts off saying, “There’s a season for everything and a time for every matter under the heavens.” The following seven verses then share several statements that put side-by-side contradictory actions that we are all at least familiar with in our human experience: “a time for giving birth and a time for dying, a time for planting and a time for uprooting what was planted… a time for tearing down and a time for building up... a time for loving and a time for hating, a time for war and a time for peace.” I think you get the point.

            Now, this is a great reminder for us that no one event or stage in our lives is going to last forever. With the help of Ecclesiastes, we can begin to believe the popular phrase, “This too shall pass.” Now, I recognize that I am in a particular stage in my life. Just as high school, college, and seminary were stages in my life that did not last forever, I know that I am not going to be a dad raising kids forever. Eventually, my 5-year-old, my 2-year-old, and our baby on the way will grow up and move out of the house (insert obligatory dad “Or else I’ll kick them out of the house!” comment here that we all know isn’t true). I know that when I get sick, that is only an event that will pass as my body heals. Yet, even knowing that there is a season for everything, I have been noticing more and more lately that life is more complicated than that. Often times, stages in life don’t take turns and seem to run together.

            For example: I had the immense honor and pleasure of officiating my baby sister’s wedding. She had finally found a good guy who is a good fit for her to share her life with. The only thing I wish is that it didn’t mean that she was moving to a small town in western Kansas! Maybe two weeks before the wedding, my new brother-in-law’s grandfather passed away. He was one of the first family members of Reagan’s that my sister, Britt, met. This was a devastating loss for the family… and all the while, there’s still a wedding to be planned. 5 days before the wedding, my dad was in an accident where his leg was injured, which drastically changed some things about how this weekend wedding in Wichita, KS was going to logistically play out (such as me doing all the driving now). Then finally, the same weekend that my sister’s wedding is happening, The United Methodist Church as a worldwide denomination was convening in St. Louis in an attempt to come to some sort of decision of how we, as a denomination, was going to move forward concerning how inclusive we were going to be of our LGBTQ+ brothers and sisters. What would be decided (or not decided) doesn’t change my ministry objective of making disciples of Jesus Christ, but it does have ramifications on how I go about it.

            In some ways, going into the wedding weekend, it felt like a perfect storm… and yet, there in the moment, with the loss of loved ones, injuries, and the fear of possible implications for my denomination swirling all around these four days, ministry was still happening. I saw where a nurse from Bucklin (my sister’s new hometown) helped to change my dad’s wounds. Encouragement and love seemed to rain down on Britt and Reagan. People were chipping in and helping with all the non-glorious, behind the scenes things because they loved my sister. God’s love was present all over that wedding, no matter what was happening that could have deterred it. Ministry still happened – and not just from me, the pastor!

            Last weekend was another reminder of this. My 2-year-old was sick so my wife and kids didn’t make it to church so that my daughter could get better and not share the virus she had with the congregation. All throughout the service, I was concerned about my daughter. Even while that was going on at my home, though, we brought in 3 new members to the church, two by profession of faith, and one of them was baptized!

            One can look time and time again throughout history and in your own personal lives where everything from sickness to tragedies to hate were in play, yet you can still see where God was at work through the Body of Christ. Historically, you see where ministry was still happening in the midst of the Great Depression as churches were stepping up and feeding the hungry. We hear stories of brothers and sisters in Christ housing Jews in Nazi Germany during the Second World War. We see where Martin Luther King, Jr. led by civil disobedience and preaching God’s love for ALL of humanity to promote racial equality in the midst of the practice of segregation. Then, going through the Scriptures, you come across story after story of how God’s people were facing adversity – whether it was famine, enslavement, or being oppressed by an occupying force – and God’s love was still being shown by prophets like Elijah, Queens like Esther, and even the woman, Mary, who would share the good news to a room of disbelieving men that Jesus had risen from the dead.

            Simply put: ministry doesn’t have its own stand-alone season. No matter if the season of life that you are in is joy or sadness, a season of youth or a season of golden years, there is always time for ministry. There is always time to share God’s love with those around you. May you be empowered, no matter what season of life you feel like you might be in currently, to minister to those around you; for ministry is ALWAYS in season!

Tell Me a Story...

Tell Me a Story...

This entry is shorter than my other posts. This is the first article that I have submitted to my local newspaper for their clergy article section. I liked the material and figured that it would be a good post, even though it is short and I had to deal with the constraints of a word limit of just 500. I hope that you find it enlightening and encourages you to, in whatever way(s) you may choose, to share your story!

  Stories captivate us. No doubt, several of you reading this article may be remembering how, just yesterday, you sat down with family and friends around a table with a seemingly endless amount of food… and in between bites of turkey, sweet potato casserole, and rolls, there was a regaling of stories both old and new. As new fits of laughter broke out at the most recent anecdote about your father and that embarrassing moment of when you were in grade school slips out (thank you, sibling…), you may recall feeling lost in the stories being told. No longer are you sitting down at a dinner table in your family home, but you are transported in mind and spirit, feeling as though you are either in on the action yourself or were experiencing it first hand yourself. At least, that’s what the best stories do… they reel you in hook, line, and sinker.

This experience proves something: stories have power. Stories have been told in all sorts of medium: worlds have been created in novels, superhumans find their way in comic books, and imaginations are stretched at the heroics witnessed on the silver screen. Then, of course, there is the recounting by storytellers, both novice and master, around dinner tables or campfires. What many fail to realize, however, is that we each have our own story, and every story is worth sharing.

There is a reality present within the church in North America: it is in decline. We can blame shifting cultural values, conflicting priorities, consumerism - even traveling sports leagues! - but I’m not sure that it’s any of those external things that are at the root of the decline. Instead, I believe it’s because Christians have not been sharing their stories of how Christ changed their lives. Think about it - if Christians were able to better articulate an answer to the question “Why Jesus?” do you believe that the church would be shrinking across the continent?

The story of Jesus is one of restoration and freedom, and Jesus’ story intersects in some way, shape, or form with the stories of everyone else. If we allow shame to keep us from sharing our part of the larger Jesus narrative, then we will be unable to share how we were freed by Christ from our own shameful past… a past that may well be reflected in the lives of our neighbors and co-workers who claim the title of “non-believer” as their own. Imagine the impact that you could make in the life of someone that you love if you stretched beyond your comfort zone in order to share your story of transformation as a result of Jesus Christ. Imagine that your story is the one that could bring your neighbor to the feet of Christ because they resonated with your honesty, authenticity, and your love for them…

Now go - share your story with someone in your life. It may just be the story that they needed to hear to begin their journey with Christ.


Photo Credit: https://aoshi.bandcamp.com/album/tell-me-a-story-the-fanfic-appreciation-album

Am I Lost?

Am I Lost?

     This past weekend I got to have a first experience. For a number of years now, my mother-in-law has enjoyed gathering bother of her children and their families together for her birthday. The last three times that my wife and kids and brother-in-law and his wife gathered together for Marla's birthday celebration weekend had been at some State Park's cabin. This time was different, though: they had gotten a houseboat! I have never been on a houseboat in real life... I've seen them in pictures and in the movie "Sleepless in Seattle" - then one of the home makeover shows on HGTV redid one!

     Thankfully, my family didn't mind my assertiveness (which is odd, because I don't feel that I usually assert myself in new situations) as I jumped to the helm and steered the boat towards the open lake in search of a place to stay the night! I grasped the basics pretty quickly. Throttle and steering wheel were the least of my worries. What I wasn't so confident about, however was reading the topographical map. Thankfully, my brother-in-law's wife, Kim, was more than happy to help me by giving a second opinion of where we believed we were.

     The next morning, after we had set out from the place we had beached for the night, they told me to just go out along the lake. Once we finally got cell service, though, plans were made to be in French Lick, IN for a train ride and, realizing that I wasn't entirely confident about where we were actually at, I decided to start heading back the direction that I believed the marina to be in. I was afraid that if we didn't head back then, if we were actually lost, then we'd never get to the scenic train ride before it embarked. Realizing that I had let the boat drift and that we were no longer facing the direction that we had headed out in, I began to panic. Thankful for a compass app on my iPhone, I immediately placed it on the navigational panel, and was frantically trying to locate where we were on this topographical map by identifying land features, all the while trying to exude confidence so that the one among us who was starting to feel sick wouldn't stress.

     So we headed the direction that I believed to be the marina, calling Kim back over to help me double check our location - yet even as we headed Southeast, the direction that the map showed the marina should be relative to where we were (somewhat) certain was our location, I had this nagging feeling. As the rising sun's glare off the lake effectively blinded me from being able to read the map when I looked at it, I panicked even more. Finally, we saw a bridge ahead that there was no way we could mistake on the map, and this also meant that we were close. My own stress levels went down drastically as I realized that we weren't lost after all.

     This got me to thinking, though, how often do we feel lost in our lives, even while we are heading in the right direction? And why is it that we often feel that we are lost in our spiritual journeys, just to look back on those times of confusion and realize that we were good all along? I can't be the only one to think and feel that. Seriously - sometimes we're convinced that we're headed the wrong direction; yet when we try going the way in accordance with whoever we deem to be "the expert," we wind up losing ourselves even more.

     One of the stories from the Bible that has resonated with me comes from the Gospel of John towards the end. Peter and Jesus are walking along the shoreline. Just a few days ago, Peter and the rest of the world had seen Jesus crucified, but they soon realized that the grave couldn't keep Jesus down! Yet during this heart-to-heart, Jesus shows Peter what his journey was going to be like and how far it would take him (as he stretched out his arms, indicating that he, too, would be crucified). Something about this disturbed Peter. He then proceeded to ask Jesus about what John's path was going to look like. This may have been for a number of reasons, but I think it had something to do with wanting to know if John's path would be any smoother than his own - maybe Peter felt that his way wasn't the most optimal for sharing Christ. Then Jesus essentially told Peter, "Don't worry about anyone else - You do You."

     I believe that there are a number of reasons why we feel lost in our spiritual lives:

• Sometimes we see others going about their Christian walk and they make it look effortless, so when we see the struggle in our own lives, it's hard not to think, "What am I doing wrong?"
• It's all new. This whole "Christian walk" or "Discipleship Journey" doesn't have a one-way-fits-all deal, and because of that, it is hard to give blanket instructions to grow closer to Christ that will work perfectly for everyone. So even after we have "the basics" down, we will come across new territory that maybe nobody we know has traversed before.
• Similarly, because we haven't travelled this path before, we may lack confidence and assertiveness in our steps which can lead to doubt.
• Finally, there will be those we come across that flat out tell you that you're going the wrong way. I've heard a lot of supposed disqualifications from Christians, and even pastors, such as, "If you don't speak in tongues then you're not truly a born-again Christian"; a declaration that the Catholic Church is actually a cult; you're not a Christian if you condone homosexuality at all (as well as its opposite - you're not a Christian if you aren't fully accepting of the LGBTQ+ community). This list of supposed disqualifications  that designate you as "lost" goes on.

    I know that your journey looks different from mine - and that's not a bad thing. In some ways, that's the way it's supposed to be. We are all unique individuals that have a different kind of relationship with our Lord, God. Some need God to be the Great Physician while others are needing God to help them know what it is to be human. Many are drawing to God as a Father, while others need God as Mother's nurture.  Recognizing this, I'm not going to tell you that you have to go a certain way. Even when I see another denomination's Christian doctrine more as dogma, I recognize that they are experiencing God in a different aspect / light than I am - and as long as people are coming to actually know Christ, who am I to step in their way?

     I am called to draw closer to Christ and witness in my own, unique way. So am I lost? No... just different.

     Hope to see you at the marina!

Death

Death

  Death is hard. Is that statement really necessary? It seems really obvious… Here is a concept, an idea, a reality that no living thing can escape. Everything from human beings to worms in the ground to the flowers in your garden will eventually cease functions of life and turn back to dust. I know – super morbid.

So we see this fact of life and have experienced it second hand to some degree. One of the true honors that I have as a pastor is when people allow me to come alongside them in their journey of mourning the loss of a loved one. I have the opportunity to sit down with families as they share with me what made their parent / child / sibling so incredibly special to them. Between tears and laughter, they share a pain that I’ve become convinced we were never designed to understand.

I remember my grandma Cassiday. Both of my grandfathers had passed away before I turned 2, and my maternal grandmother passed away when I was in the 5th grade. Grandma Cassiday, though, I remember spending New Year’s Eve nights with, her living with my family my senior year of high school, and eating Pizza King pizza from across the street while working on the jigsaw puzzle that was always on the card table beside her dining room table. Then, while I was living in Kentucky and going to seminary, she got sick. I was married in December of 2009, and between the cold and her health, she was unable to make it to the small town of Keithsburg, Illinois where Eva and I made our vows.

      It wasn’t too long after that my parents informed me that she was in the hospital and likely wasn’t going to make it. And then, on a spring day, while Eva and I were sitting in the car in a parking lot in Lexington after being to a new pizza place, my father told me over the phone that my grandmother wanted me to officiate her funeral. The quote might be wrong, but I believe the phrase, “Of course, Ben will do the funeral, right?” I wasn’t even a pastor yet, never done a funeral, honestly hadn’t been to many at all… and it took me close to a week to give my parents my affirmative. It was painful. This had been my only grandparent that I had been able to develop a relationship with built on my own experiences with her instead of simply stories from back in the day.
Eva and I hadn’t been in our second apartment for long. I remember sitting down on our couch which was truly too big for the living room space it was placed in struggling with finding words to say for the homily. Then Eva sat down next to me, seeing me struggling, and sharing with me some of the wisest words I had heard: “I don’t think we were made to understand death.” As I pondered this statement, I soon realized how right she was (and no, I’m not surprised!).

      I find that we were not designed to understand death. We were made in God’s image. In the two creation accounts that we are given in the first two chapters of Genesis, we don’t see where God made humanity with an expiration date. He didn’t tell Adam and Eve after they had been formed to go out, plant a garden, then after so many years, dig a 6-foot hole in the ground to bury theirselves in. We don’t see that kind of morbid detail in humankind’s blueprint. Instead, God made mankind in God’s own image. Last I checked, God doesn’t die because God is eternal. So we were made in God’s image, yet we die… how is this possible?

      Take a moment and think on the nature of God. More directly, recognize that God is triune – that there is this three-in-one aspect to God that is really hard to nail down. Within God’s self, you see the aspects of Father, Son, and Holy Spirit all in relationship with one another. So, God’s very essence is relationship. When we were made in God’s image, it didn’t mean that we were given 10 fingers, 10 toes, 1 nose, 2 eyes, etc… It wasn’t that since Adam was first in the creation account that God must be a man… To be made in God’s image means that we were made with the capacity for relationship. God made us to be able to love and be loved in return. So this process of the soul part of us reaching out and touching others’ souls as we form bonds with each other is a holy thing. As we truly love each other we emulate aspects of God’s love. Since this is the part that makes us made in God’s image, this is the eternal part of us. We were not made to be isolated! This is why it can feel like a piece of is lost when someone close to you passes away – because in a very real sense, a piece of you is lost as you are no longer able to express and grow that relationship.

Jesus says in John 14 that we should not let our hearts be troubled because even though he was going where his disciples could not follow him at this time, he assured them that he was preparing a room for them in God’s house. Then he assures them that he would be coming back for them – they would not be orphaned. This is huge! For us being made in God’s image then experiencing the severing of our relationships is devastating for us. Yet Jesus here is promising that this relationship with the disciples would not be severed. This is not the devastation that they had experienced first hand before, but rather, hope in the face of the most powerful force up until that point: death.

“Where, O death, is your sting?” We read in 1 Corinthians 15:55. What we find in Christ is that the sting of death of being separated from God and others has been removed. Yes, we will die here on earth. We shall shed our mortal coils, but that’s not the end. Jesus shares with us that he is going before us to prepare a place, so that when we do follow him after life (when we die) we will still live as we participate in and practice our relationships.

When it comes to our days here on earth, this thought gives us varying degrees of comfort. In the United Methodist Book of Worship’s Service of Death and Resurrection I use when I preside over a funeral, there is a line in the Greeting of the liturgy that goes, “We come together in grief, acknowledging our human loss.” When we separated from God (for that’s what sin is, a voluntary separation in relationship), death was introduced as humanity (Adam and Eve) chose their own way apart from the author and source of life. This very much makes our loss a human loss. Yet our God is so good to us that through the forgiveness offered in Christ Jesus, death isn’t the end for experiencing a relationship with God. That experience will be different for sure, but the part of us that is truly made in God’s image will live on.

So, is death hard? Certainly. Is death the end? Not so much. As we acknowledge our human loss, “May God grant us grace, that in pain we may find comfort, in sorrow hope, in death resurrection.”


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